Day 95: radical self-love (a holiday miracle)

I have been working really hard to reevaluate my approach to food, bodies, and health, and I think I’ve come a long way. I can truthfully say these are things I actually believe, not just things I pay lip service to:

1. Food is not the enemy.
2. It is not healthy to demonize entire food groups or macronutrients.
3. Carbs are not “bad.” Fat is not “bad”.
4. For godsake, eat, your brain and body need fuel to function.

I’ve always indulged on holiday food to the uncomfortably stuffed point, and have always felt guilty about it, which just triggers a spate of bad food choices. My new, healthier philosophy on holiday food: eat it and enjoy it. It doesn’t happen very often. A day or two of holiday food isn’t going to be the undoing of my health journey.

Giving myself the freedom and the grace to eat the holiday food had an unexpected effect the last couple days: I didn’t stuff myself at any point. I didn’t even have dessert on Christmas because I knew I was comfortably full without it, and it would still be there tomorrow. But I still felt like I got some great holiday treats in: eggnog pancakes, crab-artichoke dip, cookies, beef-and-noodles (my family’s traditional Christmas dinner). And all for about 2900 calories. I am really proud of this. It’s more than the 2200 I’m currently aiming for, but it’s way less than previous holidays, when I’ve stuffed myself silly on everything at every opportunity. Today I had two big meals of leftovers and I enjoyed every single bite… and again hit about 2900 calories.

When I looked at the numbers, the extra calories don’t really matter. Averaged out over 4 weeks at ~2200 kcal per day, these two days add a whopping 15 calories to the daily totals. That’s right. In a month of 2200-kcal days, 2 days of nothing but holiday food, fat, and carbs only brings up the daily average to 2215 kcal.

The other thing I was really proud of yesterday was that I fit holiday feasting into the context of my regular habits. Yesterday morning I did my c25k run and it was lovely, hardly anyone else out there, just me and the world, and I got my best distance yet! The eggnog pancakes tasted especially awesome after that.

One last thing today. The BF got me amazing presents–a fitbit and a jetboil (that’s a backpacking stove for all you non-hikers)! It’s so weird that my big presents this year were related to athletic hobbies…and I’m absolutely stoked about it. My self identity has changed pretty radically the last few months. I’m a runner. How do I know? Because I put on running shoes and run. I’m a weight lifter. How do I know? Because I go to the gym and pick up heavy things. I’m a hiker. How do I know? Because I put on hiking boots and go into the wild and walk. Pretty sweet.

Fitness today
Rest. But just doing chores around the house the fitbit claims I walked a mile and a half. I’m pretty excited to start logging these miles in my Miles to Mordor project.

In search of my TDEE
Kcal yesterday: 2919
Kcal today: 2918


2 thoughts on “Day 95: radical self-love (a holiday miracle)

  1. Good for you! Those gifts sound great. I got some athletic hobby related things too! LOL

    My parents got me a Camelbak day pack for our hikes and my cousin got me wireless headphones for the gym! So fun getting stuff like that.

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